“The most important thing in learning the jhanas,” began Dharma teacher Leigh Brasington, looking out to a roomful of eager meditators draped in a rainbow of shawls and jackets, “is to not have any expectations.”
Well, I certainly checked that box. When I signed up for this retreat, titled “Jhanas and Insights”, taught by Leigh Brasington and Rachael O’Brien, I only had a vague intention to improve my concentration. My attitude towards the jhanas – defined by Leigh as “altered states of consciousness which can arise during periods of strong concentration” – was one of curiosity mired with caution. The first teacher who mentioned jhanas to me warned that they were addictive and would distract from insight development – not to be taught until a practitioner has reached a certain level of awakening. However, the next few teachers I met – especially from the MIDL community – opened the possibility of jhanas being a natural progression in one’s ability to let go, and a supportive condition for deeper insights.
In addition to all this information, I know of people who had awakening insights without jhana practice, so the pressure was off. After all, the point of the whole thing for me is to awaken, with or without the jhanas. So I came into this retreat thinking, “If I experience jhanas, great, but as long as I deepen my concentration to create a more fertile ground for insight, that is already perfect.”
The beautiful thing about not having expectations (“I have to attain X jhanas in these 10 days no matter what!”) was that, freed from the constricting demands of craving, I could stay open to any need for rest or movement that arose. I took many walks around the retreat center, marveling at the hummingbirds and the blue heron, taking in the fresh, lush greenery and the fog covering the distant hills. I napped every day, too, sometimes coming 20 minutes late to the early afternoon meditation session.
These restful moments were balanced by diligent awareness, with a mind buoyed up by inspiration and gratitude. The retreat surroundings brought forth a tender recognition that I was receiving from many, among them: the workers in the cafeteria, the landscapers who maintained the grounds we enjoyed, the retreat organizers, and, of course, Leigh and Rachael, who gave rousing Dhamma talks and guided us carefully in daily one-on-one interviews. Having been to stricter retreats that exacerbated my tendency to be forceful in meditation practice, it was a relief to be trusted to organize our sitting, walking, and resting periods in ways that suited us best.
My mind, feeling safe and supported, readily settled into the flow of practice and dropped into the bliss of the jhanas.
At first, it was a little freaky. These states felt… different (they are, after all, “altered states of consciousness”), and my mind was skittish, eager to jump out after short dips into the flow of happiness. What helped me was the instruction from Rachael to relax and appreciate each jhana’s wholesome and healing qualities. Following this instruction allowed the mind and body to steep more and more in bliss and, in time, naturally incline towards subtler pleasures. Once I got the hang of entering the first jhana, it took only a gentle nudge or sigh of release to move into second, third, and fourth jhanas.
In lessons with MIDL teacher Stephen Procter, I am reminded again and again of what it takes to deepen one’s concentration: letting go with clear comprehension, especially noticing how letting go feels in the mind and body (spoiler: it’s always much more pleasant than holding on 🙂). I learned from Stephen that concentration practice is not about doing – forcefully keeping things still – but about the doer herself fading away into peace. This shift in approach has been the most important factor in deepening my concentration in daily life. In the supportive environment of the retreat, it took me further into the jhanas.
Unsurprisingly, my attitude towards the jhanas has shifted to great enthusiasm, and not just because of how out-of-this-world-never-experienced-before-awesome they feel 🙂 Far from being an indulgence, the jhanas taught me how increasingly profound peace can manifest when one’s “self” – especially the mind’s self-making activities – diminish. And that perhaps, just perhaps… the mind’s fixation on solidifying and adorning this “self” is not the way to happiness after all 🙂
This series covers my (still very new) experience of learning the jhanas during a retreat and practicing with them in daily life.
Part 1: you are here!
Part 2: Recalibrating Pleasure
Part 3: Six Months After
